Sunday, February 19, 2012

warm water and your own breath.. all you need to wake up..

a story about waking up in the body to the reality that we are..

bathing in the rich mineral waters that flow from the earth
melting into the warmth, held by the rocks and the mud below
the tension releasing into the spring, eyes closed,
falling deep into that space of oneness with mother earth
I soaked and I got lost in sounds of running water
cool air on my skin and the sense of me fading away as the night sky came to be
I scrubbed the mud, rocks and sand against my skin and this incredible life force
surged up floating and warm my body giving way to the water
I felt completely free and at one with all the miraculous nature all around me
when the warm made me feel sleepy I headed for the ice cold water and plunged in
electric shocks shot through me and I relaxed and sat in the stream for as long as i could
back to the warmth, touching every rock, feeling like the energy of the rock was ancient
as was I held, so loving held and fed by the spring
I started being breathed by life itself, deep breaths, so much energy coming into the body, trembling and shaking, this went on for some time, life was moving through me in such a profound way, filling me completely as if to push out what was ready to go...
I felt a deep release happening, letting go.. letting go of so much that I'd been holding onto
(to what i thought I needed, what I thought I was), the rocks and the water
seemed to be pulling it out of me, there was no resistance, I was ready to let it all go.
All that the body was holding was moving on, in the deep relaxation and release something
new was being born, a spaciousness, an aliveness, an openness.. it continued to expand and open..
the breath grew deeper and faster, then the tears began to flow, energy surging through me, pouring out through my arms, in my tears, in each exhale, I shook and i moaned, deep lion breath exhales letting it all out.
wow wow wow, through the intensity, there was so much calm and relaxation and presence!
Each moment flowed one to the next, with such intelligence, I felt the perfection as if everything was in its perfect time, all I had to do was just to let it be.. let it be..

What followed the deep movement and release was laughter, I was filled with a sense of lightness and carefree abandon..
I started to play and giggle, blowing bubbles and singing out..
sheer delight, of the sound of rubbing rocks together in my hands, feeling the smoothness
and roughness as the same time, this went on for a long time..
but the deep relaxedness and alert awareness remained, I stayed completely with myself..
As my body floated and danced in the water every movement was a celebration of
sensuality, it was as if all of nature was making love to me, showing me this delight of love
that was innate and so obvious.
And so in continued, giggles, surrendering deeper into the warmth and totally
letting it have me, completely present unto myself, all the way here, in each moment,
here and loving it..
so so so grateful.. for this life, this openness, this perfection.. so much appreciation!

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